Connect One
2007
Connect One
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Goodbye Lonely: 5 Steps to (Re)Connecting
This started as an article to address women and feelings of isolation, but as I spent time with the topic, I kept coming back to the words "connect" and "connection." Connecting, I thought, is the opposite of isolation, and if it's the opposite, then surely it's also the solution. One study I read suggested that the opposite of isolation is belonging -- that to no longer feel isolated, one must feel a sense of belonging. I don't think it's that complicated, that deep -- at least, not necessarily. So here's my theory: women who feel isolated need to connect -- or reconnect. It's as simple as that.
Here are a few things I know are playing factors in lack of connection for women who feel isolated. See if you can relate.
1. Because we spend a lot of time alone, we miss the opportunity to connect by accident. You know, like engaging in water cooler chat at the office or an impromptu conversation with a random person when you stop by the coffee shop for your morning cup of java. And frankly, on the rare occasion when we do get these opportunities, we close ourselves to them because we've gotten so comfortable in our disconnectedness. No, I didn't say we like it, but we do feel safe there.
2. Because we crave connection so badly, every connection becomes so vital that we can easily set ourselves up for disappointment or misunderstanding. And in fact, we so badly want connection that we seem to only focus on deep connection and forget there are so many other opportunities for us to connect.
If you wonder what I know about this, I know a lot. I'm living it. You might call me a recovering "isolatee." You know, one who was previously isolated -- or at least thought she was. The feelings of isolation kind of snuck up on me. First, it was because it was too much trouble or took too much energy to connect outside my comfort zone. (It was easier to stay home with the dog!) Then, it was because I started working at home full time (which, yes, also had its benefits.) It just kept growing, and when my dog, Cooper, died, it hit its peak. Once Cooper was gone, I didn't really have to go outside at all, at least not on an average day, and I didn't.
What is it for you -- that thing that keeps you disconnected? Do you work from home full time? Did you just move to a new city where you don't know anyone? Maybe you have recently (or not so recently) lost a spouse or become an empty nester? Or maybe you have loads of people around you and somehow feel disconnected anyway? Whatever the case, there is one thing you should know for sure. The feelings of isolation don't have to last. There is something you can do about them, and that something is to get connected.
I have identified five levels of connecting, and I believe all five levels, while very unique in purpose, are essential - one just as important as the next.
The Five Levels of Connecting are:
Level 1: Being -- simply putting yourself physically out into the world and amongst others. No words, no interaction required. This is like a primer to simply remind you that you are, in fact, not alone, to open your mind to the idea of connecting and to the opportunity to connect.
Level 2: Interacting -- to be in the world AND acknowledge it and the people who share it with you. This is where you become conscious to connecting and includes things like observing your surroundings, waving at a neighbor and, yes, maybe even short conversation.
Level 3: Engaging -- beyond interacting, this takes the connection a little deeper and likely involves repetitive connection. Engaging typically occurs with people you run into and enjoy on a regular basis -- people I call "friendlies" -- but may also occur with total strangers as you become more open to connecting in this way.
Level 4: Targeting/Intentional -- at this level, you are connecting with people on purpose. These are the people you choose to "do" life with. You make a point to connect with them, to share more of yourself and your life with them -- on purpose.
Level 5: Culminating/Intimate -- This is where you share your deepest level of yourself and is reserved for your most intimate relationships, including your spouse or romantic partner and possibly with close family members or your very best friend. These are the connections with people whom you rely on the most and with whom you share your best and worst of life.
To resolve feelings of isolation and loneliness, you must be keenly aware of and strive to connect on all five levels. In fact, if you've been "doing" life alone for a while, you may have to start at level one and work your way up. You can take baby steps, but you've got to get started! It's time to open yourself to the world, and take my word for it, if you will start now creating opportunities to connect even at levels one and two, you will soon turn around to see that you are no longer alone (or lonely.) You will turn around to see that you are one amidst millions of others right outside your door, others with whom you are meant to share a world - and a life, whether for a reason, a season, or a lifetime.
I say strap on your boots, open the door and walk out into a world that will be a little more connected itself because you have come out to play!!
About the Author
Shannon Short, The SPARK! Coach, helps individuals embrace their truth and ignite thier life through a raised self-awareness and a new perspective on life and possibility! In the Fall 2009, SPARK Coaching is introducing SPARK! Connect, a new group coaching program for people who want to raise awareness around and learn to actively live out the five levels of connecting in their lives. Want to be the first to know all the details about the upcoming SPARK! Connect sessions? Find out more at http://www.thesparkcoach.com/group_coaching and, while there, make sure to contact SPARK! to be added to our mailing list!
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Connect $9.99 With all their social networks and virtual communities, you'd think your students are well connected. But they're still feeling alone and isolated. Whether you're a volunteer youth worker or the lead youth pastor, getting some students to open up and share their lives can be a challenge. Here you'll get the practical tools needed to help you engage students in meaningful, one-on-one dialogue to impact their lives beyond the youth room and into adulthood. |
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Squiggle Connect $19.98 Squiggle Connect is a hilarious drawing game where players compete by changing a squiggly line into a picture. No artistic talent required...just your imagination! It all starts with a roll of the dot cube and then the dots are connected by random lines using the connect cube. Once everyone has their unique squiggly line in front of them, play begins. Players have 60 seconds to transform their wavy and wacky line into a picture. They can be as simple or detailed as they want. When time is up, each player explains their drawing to the other players. This is where you may fall over laughing as you listen to some real nonsense! Once each player has had the chance to explain what they drew, voting begins. Each player votes on only one other players drawing using a voting card. The voting cards offer either a descriptive praise or a nuance of criticism such as put that in a doggie bag or a monkey can do better. Each card also has a point value and players give them to each other based on their picture and descrip Type: Board Games Gender: Unisex Age: Child,Teen,Adult |
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The Connect Effect $22.95 Networking is not mere socializing--it is a vital personal and professional development skill. An effective network can make you more knowledgeable, help you address critical issues, accelerate your career, and even improve your health and well-being. It's just too important to be left to chance. With "The Connect Effect" you can take a conscious, systematic approach to networking. To begin with, Author Michael Dulworth helps you evaluate how network-savvy you are. Dulworth then identifies three distinct kinds of networks: personal, professional, and virtual, exploring their specific characteristics and offering strategies, tools, and resources for building up and making the best use of each one. Stories from Dulworth's over twenty years of experience running networks, as well as interviews with top executives, researchers, and thought leaders, provide insights and advice about how networks function in the real world. |
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Solorailrade; Quick Connect Adapter $17.9 Solorailrade; system quick connect adapter allows all quick connect elements (QF track heads or QP pendants) to be used with the LM system rail. The adapter contains a threaded nipple for quick connect socket sets and attaches anywhere along the LM track. One adapter must be ordered for each quick connect element used on a system. Available in Chrome, Brushed Nickel and Dark Bronze finishes. |
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NYKO Net Connect for Wii $15.99 Type: Net Connect Features: Get the fastest and most secure internet connection available for the Wii with Nyko's Net Connect. The Net Connect allows the Wii to easily connect to any high-speed wired internet connection. The Net Connect is a USB network adaptor that converts one of the Wii's high speed USB ports into a Cat5 internet jack. Simply plug the Wii in to your existing network, no complicated passwords or software installation is necessary. The wired internet connection provides a safe, secure and stable internet connection for use with the Opera browser, WiiConnect24, online with online enabled titles and other online features of the Wii. Creates a high-speed LAN Internet connection for your Nintendo Wii Requires no wireless network, security codes or complex setup Connects to your existing Internet connection using a standard Cat5 network cab... |
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RubbermaidQuick Connect Squeegee Frame $23.99 0% 1 Each Quick Connect Squeegee Frame offers lightweight aluminum construction for improved productivity. Use with Rubbermaid item Q424 Dust Pad. One-step connecting mechanism speeds mop assembly and changeover. Flat frame profile is sanitary and easy to clean. Replaceable hook and loop strips extend product life. Rubbermaid Q424 Dust Pad Aluminum Mop Frame No Q57000YL00 Quick Connect Squeegee Frame Rubbermaid Rubbermaid, Inc Yellow www.rubbermaid.com |
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Flexrail1 Quick Connect Adapter - Platinum $89 -The FLEXRAIL1 Quick Connect transformer adapter allows any QP pendant or QF fixture to be used with the FLEXRAIL1 system. -Order one HM1-EN50 for each Quick Connect element used on the FLEXRAIL1. -For use with WAC Quick Connect fixtures and accessories. See companion items for options. |
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Wii Net Connect $49.34 Get the fastest and most secure internet connection available for the Wii with Nyko's Net Connect. The Net Connect allows the Wii to easily connect to any high-speed wired internet connection. The Net Connect is a USB network adaptor that converts one of the Wii's high speed USB ports into a Cat5 internet jack. Simply plug the Wii in to your existing network, no complicated passwords or software installation is necessary. The wired internet connection provides a safe, secure and stable internet connection for use with the Opera browser, Wii Connect 24, online with online enabled titles and other online features of the Wii. FeaturesCreates a high-speed LAN Internet connection for your Nintendo WiiRequires no wireless network, security codes or complex setupConnects to your existing Internet connection using a standard Cat5 network cableUSB 2.0 connection supports the Wii at full speed, even faster than Wi-FiWired Internet connection is more reliable than Wi-FiCompatible with:Wii Opera Browser¿WiiConnect24Wii Parade¿online play of your favorite online enabled titlesother online features of the Wii |
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Raritan PARAGON DIRECT CONNECT PC Z-SERIES CIM TO CONNECT PC $158.99 1 1 x 15-pin HD-15 Male 2 Year Limited 2 x 6-pin mini-DIN (PS/2) Female 2 x RJ-45 Female 3.20 oz 32°F (0°C) to 104°F (40°C) Operating 5 KVM Max Supported Video Resolution is 1600 x 1200 Connect your local personal computer for access from one User Station ; Connect one PC to Z4200U chain; with "DirectConnect" technology; Paragon Ready HD-15 KVM Cable Adapter Mac PARAGON DIRECT CONNECT PC Z-SERIES CIM TO CONNECT PC PC Paragon RJ-45 Raritan Raritan Computer UKVMSPD White mini-DIN (PS/2) www.raritan.com |
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Marshall Connect-N-Play Set $35.99 Marshall Connect-N-Play Set ULTIMATE PLAY SET! Give your ferret the ultimate place to play and hide away. This set includes all of Marshalls "Connect-N-Play" line. Build however your fuzzy likes! This play set will keep your ferret occupied for hours. Treats can be placed on one end of the tunnel as a new game. Once they get bored with one design you can re-design it and have more fun! Available in fashionable pink floral pattern. Save money by buying this complete set. Kit Includes: (1) 650746 Connect-N-Play Critter Tent (2) 651158 Connect-N-Play Tubes (1) 650744 Leisure Lodge (1) 650753 Double Fun Tunnel |
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Crafting Short Screenplays That Connect $37.95 The only screenwriting book that includes a DVD that contains performances of the short films and screenplays that are featured in the book! The beauty and power of any story lies in its ability to connect to the reader, listener, or observer. Crafting Short Screenplays That Connect is the first screenwriting guide to introduce connection as an essential, although essentially overlooked, aspect of creating stories for the screen and of the screenwriting process itself. Written with clarity and humor, this book teaches the craft of writing short screenplays by guiding the student through carefully focused writing exercises of increasing length and complexity. Eight award-winning student screenplays are included for illustration and inspiration. The text is divided into three parts. Part one focuses on preparing to write by means of exercises designed to help students think more deeply about the screenwriter's purposes; their own unique vision, material and process; and finally about what screenplays are at their simplest and most profound level--a pattern of human change, created from specific moments of change--discoveries and decisions. Part two teaches students how to craft an effective pattern of human change. It guides them through the writing and re-writing of "Five (Not So Easy) Pieces"--five short screenplays of increasing length and complexity--focusing on a specific principle of dramatic technique: The Discovery, The Decision, The Boxing Match, The Improbable Connection, and The Long Short Screenplay. Part Three presents the five screenplays used throughout the book to illustrate the dramatic principles that have been discussed, and includes interviews with the screenwriters, a look at where they are now and what they are doing, and brief discussion of how each film evolved. * Groundbreaking book that stresses human connection as the basis of a good screenplay-not conflict * The only screenwriting book that includes a DVD that contains performances of the short films and screenplays that are featured in the book * Ample exercises for practice and inspiration |
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Vtech ATT Dual Handset Connect-to-Cell. Each $73.63 Manufacturer: Vtech. Each. AT&T 2 handset connect to cell system Pair up to 4 Bluetooth cell phones with TL92271 base Simultaneously connect up to 2 Bluetooth cell phones to the TL92271 to manage calls from either device, or connect one Bluetooth cell pho |
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How to Instantly Connect with Anyone $16.95 Meet new people and converse with confidence. Be credible and charismatic in every social and business situation. Make friends and important contacts wherever you go. Command the respect of everyone you meet. You know who they are. They're the people who, regardless of money, education, looks, or personality, make an impression wherever they go. They are master communicators, and everyone enjoys talking to them. How to Instantly Connect with Anyone shows you how to be one of those lucky few. Communication guru Leil Lowndes arms you with ninety-six all-new, cutting edge, research-based communications techniques for success in life, love, and business.You will smash the invisible glass ceiling that keeps many people down both personally and professionally. Your new weapon is a neurologically and psychologically sound concept called “Emotional Prediction,” or E.P. Leil Lowndes explains the power of EP and shows you how to harness it through deceptively simple methods to reach greater success in all of your relationships. An enhanced ebook is now available with 11 demonstration video clips, including 5 never-before-published techniques! Select the Kindle Edition with Audio/Video from the available formats. |
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8 x 12.5mm Elbow Push In to Connect Male One Touch Fittings $4.2 Description:Please notice below size before ordering the item to avoid buying wrong thing.Made of good quality metal and plastic material and the Elbow One Touch Fittings is finished by good work.Elbow Push In to Connect Fittings are used in pneumatic piping.Metal male threads on one end of the Push In Fittings, hole for tubing on other end with push-in ring to release tubing.Elliptical release ring help to connect tube easily by manual, no special tools required.Light manual pressure on the elliptical release ring is all that is required to instantly disconnect each tube.Release ring inner diameter: ~8mmMale thread outer diameter: ~9.5mmTotal Size of the Male One Touch Fittings: ~1.5" x 1.1" x 0.6" (L*W*H)Weight: 17.8gColor: gold tone & bluePackage include:1 x Push In Fittings |
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Emulex One Connect OCE11102-I 10Gigabit Ethernet Card - PCI Express x8 - 10GBase-CR - Internal - Low-profile OCE11102IX $957.27 Emulex One Connect OCE11102-I 10Gigabit Ethernet Card - PCI Express x8 - 10GBase-CR - Internal - Low-profile OCE11102IX |
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Flashback Arrestor And Quick-connect Combo $119.95 Play it Safe Designed to install easily between regulators and hoses, flashback arrestors suppress dangerous flames before reaching the fuel source, keeping you safe. Features internal check valves, which are designed to prevent the reverse flow of gas, one of the major causes of flashback. Use a quick-connect between the flashback arrestor and hose so you can instantly connect or disconnect your torch without turning off the gas supply. Durable solid brass connectors are color-coded and feature reverse flow check valves designed to prevent accidental gas mixing. An automatic shut-off valve ensures that the gas flow is completely shut off when disconnected. |
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Connect Economics One Semester Access Card for Macroeconomics $65.8 No Synopsis Available |
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Connect Economics One Semester Access Card for Microeconomics $65.8 No Synopsis Available |
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Connect History One-Term Access Card for WEST $39.49 No Synopsis Available |
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Connect Plus One-Term Access Card for WEST $51.99 No Synopsis Available |
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How to Talk to and Instantly Connect with Anyone $32 Command attention and respect by conversing with confidence, credibility, and charisma Two books packed into one eBook !. You can speak up and be heard at business meetings. You can chat with confidence in at parties. You can be the one with the best job and most interesting friends. It’s all about how you communicate and connect with others—which is something you can learn . How to Talk to and Instantly Connect with Anyone doubles your chances of developing killer conversation skills by combining two of the best books on the subject into one eBook package. Learn how to make the right kind of connections with the right people—and enjoy better relationships, greater respect, and a richer life. This invaluable ebook set includes:. How to Talk to Anyone and How to Instantly Connect with Anyone. Get all the secrets of successful communication. These groundbreaking guides reveal nearly 200 easy and effective techniques for becoming a master communicator, showing you how to: Make an unforgettable entrance and meet the people you want to meet; Sound like an insider in any crowd, no matter how little you have in common; Use body language to captivate audiences of all sizes; Work a party the way a politician works a room; Always come across confident, credible, and charismatic wherever you are |
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Connect! $24.99 If you use the web to reach out beyond the confines of your office, cubicle, or home to connect and collaborate with others doing the same thing, you’re a web worker. In this book you'll learn how to use new web tools, discover sites and services you might want to try, and meet the social web where people are as important as corporations. You’ll learn how people are working in new ways because of the web, and how you can too. |


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